I’ve been unemployed for three months now, lying alone in my small rental apartment. After my shop closed, I desperately searched for a job, but rejection followed rejection. Every company I applied to turned me away because of my lack of education. I’m still young, but it feels as if my whole life has been put on hold. I’ve lost the courage to even try. My days have become a cycle of lying in bed, watching meaningless videos, sleeping for hours, and surviving on just one meal a day. When you stop working, you stop living, and every time I check my credit card balance and watch it shrink, the feeling of helplessness deepens. At 28, I feel like I’ve already failed.
Today marks my 229th day of lying flat in this rental apartment. Many people keep asking me, “Why don’t you just go back home? You wouldn’t need to pay rent. You’d have a warm bed, caring parents, and food on the table.” But they don’t see the hidden weight behind those seemingly kind suggestions. As an older, single woman with no job, returning home would only magnify the pressure. Every question, every comparison with neighbors’ children who are already successful, is like a sharp needle piercing my chest. Here in my tiny rental, as long as I pay rent, I can still breathe, still keep the last fragile piece of freedom that belongs to me.
#chinanews #chinacrisis #chinaeconomy #undercover #tofu
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