It all began with a WeChat message from my friend. We hadn’t seen each other in a while. She had left Beijing for a quieter, more remote town and her social media updates suggested she was diving deeper into guoxue – “national studies”, or the study of traditional Chinese culture – Buddhist philosophy and other spiritual pursuits. Her text read: “You should join our reading group. We’re studying classical Chinese texts. You will definitely love it.”
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She had been going through a rough patch: burnout at work, a deep sense of disorientation. I admired her for trying to connect with something deeper. Out of curiosity and genuine concern, I agreed to join. But a sense of unease gnawed at me. The trend of guoxue, framed as a path to enlightenment, had always unsettled me. Something about it seemed too commercialised and packaged.
In my first video session with the reading group, we were told to introduce ourselves. An older woman who seemed to hold a position of authority spoke last. “It’s so good to see young people here,” she said. “These days, no one reads any more. But you all – you have the time. Life is more than just drinking and eating.”
Her words carried a quiet disdain, as if fundamental human joys were distractions from something greater. As if nourishing the body, sharing meals, enjoying small pleasures – things that ground us in the world – were lesser pursuits.
After two more sessions, I couldn’t continue. What pushed me over the edge was a new requirement: we were to record ourselves reading the founder’s book out loud and submit these recordings for review. No discussion. No questions. Just repetition. Supposedly, this would deepen our understanding – though how exactly, no one explained.
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As a philosophy major trained in the Western tradition, I found this deeply frustrating. The purpose of engaging with a text should be to analyse, question and discuss its ideas. But here, those very acts were forbidden. I told my friend I wanted to leave. She said she needed to check with her superior first. That response alone spoke volumes.
